Its all perspective.

Over the weekend my cute 3 year old son came over to me, so excited. He wanted me to look out the window. Outside the wind had kicked up and leaves were swirling and twirling through the air. He stood at the window for the longest time, watching it. It really was a beautiful sight and for a three year old boy was completely magical.

Imagine my disappointment when I logged into Facebook a bit later only to find that one of my neighbors was complaining about the same leaves blowing into her yard. "They're not my leaves" she said. "Why should I have to rake them?" It made me a little sad. She had totally missed the beauty of the moment. She didn't see the magic.

How many times do we miss out on the magic? Some days my kids drive me crazy. Sometimes my husband annoys me. Sometimes my friend hurt my feelings. I have to decide at that point....am I willing to miss the magic?

"Take it up with him"

Recently my good friend and I were talking and she related the following story.

My friend had just had her second child. The baby had some issues after her birth that were concerning and had to stay in the hospital a few extra days. A man from her ward made some comments to my friend that hurt and offended her. The next time she saw this mans wife she brought it up, telling the wife how offended and hurt she had been. The wife stopped her saying "If you have an issue with my husband please take it up with him. He is my husband and I love him. It hurts my heart when people speak badly about him."

My cute friend had enough wisdom to not take further offence. In fact she has adopted those words anytime someone tries to speak poorly of her own husband. I thought this was great! One of the things I think is very detrimental to marriages is that it seems like women get together and instantly gravitate to complaining about their husbands. If we made it a point to always speak kindly about the men we love, and not allow anyone else to speak unkindly, there would be so much less negativity.

Another good friend, who is the author of the blog http://beautopotamus.blogspot.com/ speaks so kindly of her husband. In almost 10 years of being friends with her, I have never heard her complain about her incredible husband. It is such a pleasant thing to visit with her and see the love that she and her husband share so openly.

I would love to take this opportunity to thank my incredible husband for all her has done for me. Over the course of the last year, he has not only worked 40+ hours at one job, but often left work just in time to go to work at his second job. If he was lucky enough to only work one job, he frequently came home just in time to take one (or more) of his children to this activity or that practice, still walking in the door at 8 or 9 PM. When he was lucky enough to be at home, he came home to a wife who was bringing little or nothing to the table. He often pitched in to make dinner, do laundry, pick up the house or play with the kids. He also payed bills, went grocery shopping or ran errands. On Saturday morning he would drag himself out of bed in the wee morning hours to volunteer at the food co-op we participate it, whether I was able to go or not. When all of the things he had to do where done, he did the things he didn't have to do. He brought me my iron pills. He washed my hair. He let my cry on his shoulder. I have been so blessed to have such a wonderful sweet man in my life who loves me so well. I it is my goal to only let the most kind words cross my lips in regard to my husband and to only foster positive conversations about him and other men.

A simple touch

I had one of the most difficult days, I had ever had last week. I was already feeling yucky from my surgery, but I was also feeling sad and lonely. Hubby and i had had an argument before he left for work. My kids were kind of running wild because we had taken a few days off of school to allow for my recovery. (We'll make those up during the summer.) Right in the midst of all of that chaos my cute son managed to knock out his already loose tooth out. This would have been fine but it cut the gum all of the way to the top. My poor sad boy was bleeding and scared. I was feeling overwhelmed and frustrated, since I was home with no car and really wasn't supposed to be driving anyway. (I called the doctor and the dentist, who both agreed that I should just watch it for the time being. It does appear to be healing well.) To top everything off, the people who had offered to bring my family dinner that night were a no show. By the time we managed to get dinner cooking for our family, I was a sobbing mess.

Then something miraculous happened. At least for me it felt pretty miraculous. Hubby walked over, sat next to me on the couch and held my hand. It felt like all of the stress and hurt and frustration on the day just poured right out of my body. I felt strengthened, uplifted and soothed by his simple touch. It made all of the difference for me. Have you had this experience? Has a simple touch from someone who loves you changed the course of a day for you? A hug, or a held hand or a hand on the small of your back, letting you know that someone is there for you?

Recovery!

I finally had my surgery on the 26th of October. At this point...10 days later, I think I may actually survive. I am so excited to get a little better each day and finally feel like a wife and mom that my kids can be proud of. There have been a few interesting experiences along the way.

First of all, I am so incredibly thankful to my sweet family, that has cared for me so well. My oldest daughter stayed home from school the day after the surgery to care for me, and then they next day my oldest son stayed home. I know that was a sacrifice for them. My cute husband has been working hard to take care of us. He told me today that he missed his "wing man." When I asked him what he meant he said "I am just so used to having you right beside me. Nothing is much fun without you."

I have also been thankful to the members of the ward that have helped our family along the way. Some have helped with laundry and some with meals. More than anything, I am thankful to the two Elder's who came and gave me a blessing on that first Sunday when I was honestly the sickest I have ever been in my entire life. I still feel the comfort of that blessing today.